Confessions of an "Ugly American"

Ok first off don't let the title fool you. I don't wanna brag but I can still clean up ok for what I have to work with ha...It's in reference to an "enlightening" article I read on msn.com entitiled Travel Etiquette Tips: How to Avoid Being an"Ugly American". Now I'm really struggling with the vernacular here but that REALLY urinates me off to no end. I understand what their getting at and I've been out of the country enough times to have seen it first hand. I've been downtown Amsterdam and overheard some (other) rednecks from Alabama talking all loud about finding them some hash and hookers. On a side note, if you're known the world over as an outrageous party city, where you have to really go out of your way to do anything illegal, can you really complain much when the outrageous partiers show up and get a little obnoxious???? Spending their annoying American tourist dollars???? I get the point msn, don't talk loud, don't wear Levis and Nikes, and don't EVER express your opinion about anything... but the patronizing, pandering, political correct factor makes me want to throw up in my mouth. Also, you missed a few spots. How about, How to Avoid Being an "Ugly Arab". Like don't go to America and fly their planes into their bulidings, killing thousands of innocent people because they believe different from you. Americans find this kind of behaviour rude and unacceptable as it goes against their customs. Or how about, How To Avoid Being an "Ugly Mexican". Don't sneak across the border, use the schools and healthcare system, skip out on paying taxes, and expect the National Anthem and the freaking atm's to be in Spanish. Americans find this kind of behaviour rude and unacceptable as it goes against their customs. Where ya at msn, are you with me????? Why don't y'all spread the enlightenment all the way around?

So the more I think about this, I think I'll just stay a little closer to home. I saw some cool, old stuff in Europe, but nothing that moves me like Savannah,Ga. I met some beautiful people across the border but none as memorable as the brunette selling cigars at Bike Week. (To be fair she was originally from russia, but the chaps she wore so well were straight out of south Texas...now, there's some diversity I can celebrate...) and I've had some exhilarating moments off of US soil but none compare to heading out of Key West Fl. the last morning of bike week, rolling onto the seven mile bridge with Harleys as far as you could see in front of or behind you. That ear splitting , straight pipe, oil burning, all American, v-twin rumble just goes to show you that sometimes, being obnoxious is just our way of letting you know we're having a good time. Man, I gotta get me another bike...